From the mouth of babes

Last night one of my sons friends called me. He said that he thought I should pick my 12 yr old up from school every day because he was getting into the wrong kind of company. He said that the boys he hangs out with mess around at school and dont allow my son to work. I was really appreciative of that phone call…even though I already knew this.

You see he’d seen me at the schoo gate the day before looking for my son. It was 2.25pm and I figured Id be there for once and catch him before he went on one of his tours of Queens that lasts several hours. He wasnt there. 

I guess he cut school and slipped out one of the side doors. 

I dunno what Im going to do with him. Its not  that hes bad but since Alhaarith died..hes been on a roller coaster ride. 

He says hes afraid to die and I dont blame him.

I feel the same way.

I love my 12 year old but hes a test.

The greatest test I had with Haarith was his death.

I had another dream about Haarith last night. I was at his grave and he was there. I was leaving and he said to me Ummi I want to come with you. I said you know you cant baby but Ill be back soon. I dont know if that was like the dreams I had before. It felt more like a dream that I concocted in my psyche. But any dream where I see his face is a good dream to me.

I kinda hate wednesdays because it was on this day that my baby died.